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bali bliss

Arielle Ford Arielle Ford

Arielle Ford is a leader in the personal growth and contemporary spirituality movement. She’s been living, teaching, and promoting consciousness through many forms of media.

arielle_ford_feature

When The Soul Mate Secret came out and my married friends asked me, “How do I turn my mate into my soul mate?” I started examining my relationship with my husband and how we’ve managed to make it work so well. I realized we’ve been practicing Wabi Sabi.

Wabi-Sabi is an ancient Japanese aesthetic honoring all things old, worn, weathered, imperfect, and impermanent. It seeks to find beauty and perfection in imperfection. In relationships, we learn to love the imperfections in ourselves and in our mates.

People have been brainwashed by society to seek perfection in every area of life. We know that’s impossible. When we’re seeking perfection in ourselves and our mates, we’re constantly upset, disappointed, frustrated, and unhappy. If we can learn to love people for exactly who they are, life becomes easier, simpler, and a lot more fun.

I used to be a real perfectionist, always trying to get into perfect shape. I ran, worked out, lifted weights, measured every piece of food, and measured myself. I had a goal one year of what perfection would look like: I’d wake up one morning and weigh exactly 125 pounds, have the exact measurements I wanted, and all ten fingernails would be the same length.

When I woke up one morning and had reached that goal, after about three minutes glee I realized I wasn’t any happier than the day before. I’d spent an entire year chasing something ridiculous. I saw that it wasn’t really perfection I sought, but love, understanding, and connection. That realization shifted my entire life and freed me to start really enjoying it.

At the ends of our lives, we aren’t going to miss perfection. We’re going to miss all the crazy, quirky things we beat ourselves up for. That’s what people love most about us: our quirkiness. It’s so much better to be able to say to somebody, “You know, I just love that you can’t eat without dropping food all over yourself. I find that so adorable!”

Accepting ourselves and others for exactly who we are helps us relax. It’s a way of removing stress. Last year, we went to Bali and I ended up having healing work done every day, until I got to an incredibly deep level of relaxation I’m not sure I’ve ever been to before. Since then, I’ve made a conscious decision to notice when I’m stressed out and do something about it. My goal for this year is to maintain that sense of Bali Bliss.

– Arielle Ford

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